Oh well...

Beschäftigungstherapie

2006-07-24T16:22:00.001+02:00

Aufgrund von Visumsrestriktionen darf ich ja noch nicht arbeiten - noch nicht mal ein unbezahltes Praktikum ist drin - will aber doch nicht NUR rumsitzen. Also dachte ich mir volunteering - ehrenamtliches arbeiten - ist ne gute Alternative.

Und jetzt habe ich am Wochenende den wohl coolsten volunteer job überhaupt an Land gezogen. Ich arbeite für "Cats In Need", eine Tierschutzorganisation nur für Katzen). Und mein Job ist in's Katzenheim zu fahren und mit den Katzen zu spielen und sie zu streicheln und sowas. Hauptsache sie kommen mal aus ihren engen Boxen raus.

Ausserdem mache ich Fotos von Ihnen und stelle diese mitsamt ner Beschreibung der Katze auf diverse Internetseiten (wo sie dann adoptiert werden können) oder in Zeitungen ("Tier der Woche" Spalte - gibt's ja auch bei den meisten deutschen Tageszeitungen).

Und die ganzen Katzenklo- und Käfigreinigungsjobs waren alle schon vergeben - oooocccchhhh schaaaade - also blieben für mich nur die netteren Sachen über.

Wahoo!

Und so ist das schon seitdem ich hier bin...

2006-07-20T17:28:00.000+02:00

(Wettervorhersage für heute in Orange, CA)

Aber ich beschwere mich ja gar nicht, habe gehört dass es in Deutschland ja auch nicht viel besser ist.

27. Juli, 11:40 Uhr

2006-07-15T21:07:00.000+02:00

Hab endlich nen Termin für meine praktische Führerscheinprüfung bekommen. Tja, was habe ich noch bis vor kurzem gedacht, so etwas nie wieder achen zu müssen, aber nein... es bleibt einem ja gar nichts erspart. Ich fühle mich, als wäre ich wieder 17. Hmpfh.

ok, ok, ich geb's ja zu....

2006-07-11T19:44:00.000+02:00

so toll klappt das mit meinen posts auf diesem blog nicht. Ich hatte mir fest vorgenommen, täglich (hahaha) ein kurzes update zu liefern aber ihr seht ja was daraus geworden ist.

Seit dem letzten post ist einiges passiert, ich weiss gar nicht, wo ich anfangen soll.

- Meine Erkältung (die von furchtbar böser Natur war) hab ich überlebt, aber darauf folgte gleich ein dicker Sonnenbrand und naja, wie soll ich's sagen, eine Unverträglichkeit auf mexikanisches Essen. Flitzekacke halt. Aber mittlerweile bin ich wieder komplett funktionsfähig.

- Ich bin furchtbar geschäftig mit Behördenkram und Anschaffungen aller Art. Ich bin schon stolze Besitzerin eines neuen Fahrrads und eines neuen Autos (klickt hier für Fotos) und eines Bankkontos! Glaubt mir, letzteres zu bekommen war der schwerste Akt... .

- Ich habe meine theoretische Führerscheinprüfung gemacht und bestanden, die praktische folgt sobald ich Unterlagen von meiner Autoversicherung bekommen habe.

- Uuuuuuuuund... Jonnie hat nun auch "offiziell" um meine Hand angehalten, also sind wir nun auch "offiziell" verlobt. Die Hochzeit wird am 19. August in Laguna Beach sein.

Bei Sonnenuntergang in einem kleinen Gazebo auf ner Klippe direkt am Meer.

Zwischenzeitlich hatten wir unsere Pläne hundert mal geändert, was die Vorbereitung nicht gerade einfacher macht.

- Damit wir dann bei der Hochzeit nicht aussehen wie 2 gestrandete Wale sind wir einem Fitnessclub beigetreten (dieser hier). Neben dem normalen workout lernen wir auch kickboxen und taekwando! Hahaha.

Hmmm... da war noch mehr, was es zu berichten gab, aber mir fällt's natürlich nicht mehr ein. Die viele Sonne tut meinem Hirn nicht sonderlich gut... .

Huhu!

2006-06-15T16:20:00.000+02:00

[this blog will be in German from now on - you can find English posts on Jonnie and my joint blog.]

**********

So, endlich mal wieder ein Lebenszeichen von mir. Es wurde mir schon diverse Male unterstellt, dass ich mich noch nicht eher gemeldet habe da ich bestimmt permanent am Strand oder am Pool rumhänge und mir die Sonne auf die Wampe scheinen lasse... . Aber nein! Viel toller! Ich lag die letzten 3 Tage elendig krank im Bett und war einzig und allein mit dem Überleben einer gemeinen Erkältung beschäftigt. Zur Zeit bin ich allerdings total auf Drogen (Hustensirup mit Kirschgeschmack!), da ist das Leben dann wieder so rosarot wie meine aktuelle Hautfarbe.

Da fliegt man von Deutschland nach Kalifornien, um sich zu erkälten! Diese elendig kalten und zugigen Räume hier (Klimaanlagen, Ventilatoren) im Kontrast zu der Hitze draussen... kein Wunder wenn man da flach liegt. Hmpfh.

Ansonsten ist alles bestens hier. Jonnie ist ein Schatz.

Die Behörden hier erscheinen mir allerdings noch lahmarschiger als die deutschen - mit ein bisserl Pech kann ich noch etwa 6 Wochen warten, bis ich die theoretische Führerscheinprüfung machen oder ein Bankkonto eröffnen kann. Ich will nicht mal ansatzweise darüber nachdenken, wie lange es dauern wird bis ich meine Arbeitserlaubnis habe... .

So, das war's mal für's erste... Zeit für meine Medikamente. *röchel*

One more week...

2006-06-03T13:12:00.000+02:00

in Germany. And I'm nervous. About the flight. Mainly about the flight. About the immigration procedure at the airport. About leaving Germany for, well, some years at least. About having aged so much in the last 2 months that Jonnie won't recognize me at the airport.

Ugh.

I haven't started packing yet. I'll bring 2 suitcases and one backpack, weighing about 155 pounds altogether. That's exactly the free allowance at British Airways. I bought a new suitcase especially for this trip:

Big and red and full of functions I don't understand. Yes, my suitcase is too complicated for me.

This may or may not be my last post in English on this blog - once I'm in California, Jonnie and me will start posting again on our joint blog and this blog will be used to stay in contact with my German friends and family (hence I'll post in German).

Leaving Germany from Braubach is both harder and easier than leaving from Hamburg. It's harder because Braubach is where I grew up, where I remember an episode from my childhood with every thing I look at, where I have my family. But it's also easier to leave from here because of... well, the very same reasons.

All in all, I can't wait to be with my Liebling again. It's been 1 year and 9 months since we last met and this time was WAY too long. I know it'll be wonderful once I'm over there. If it wasn't for that damn flight! I'll leave Braubach way early in the morning (about 2 am (!!!)) so that I'll be at Frankfurt airport at around 3:30. My plane won't leave until 7 am, but thanks to the special security procedures for flights to the US you have to check-in 3 to 3.5 hours before take-off. Then I'll fly to London Heathrow, where I'll have a layover of 2 hours. I plan to spend those 2 hours shopping for my beloved Walkers chips... I'll be particularily looking out for "Slow roasted lamb with morrocan spices", "Gently infused lime and Thai spices", "Oven roasted chicken with lemon and thyme", "Peking spare rib and 5 spices" and "Caramelized onion and sweet balsamic vinegar" chips. I already love these because of their names.

And no, I didn't buy my ticket with the layover in London just because of the possibility of buying my favorite chips... nooooo, I wouldn't do that. Nooooooooo, that's crazy. There are more important things to consider when you're immigrating to another continent.

Noooooo.

Well, ok, you got me. I did book my flight with a layover in London just because of the chips. But who can blame me?! Slow roasted lamb with morrocan spices!

I'll be in Los Angeles at about 1pm (California time)/ 10pm (German time ("22 Uhr")). I don't know how long the immigration procedure will take. Maybe I'll say something stupid and they'll send me back right away.

Ah, I'm not making much sense today. Hell, I'm not making much sense for the last 2 months.

I can't wait to be with Jonnie again.

Keep your fingers crossed for the flight!!!!!

June 10, 1:15pm California Time

2006-05-10T17:14:00.000+02:00

Just bought a ticket. Only 1 more month in Germany.

I'm still not done with renovating my Braubach rooms (and with "still not done" I mean "didn't even start yet") and so I still don't have internet access at home. I'm at my mom's office right now.

Yesterday's interview went pretty well. OK, I almost lost my trousers while swearing an oath in front of the flag and George W and Dick Cheney pictures but hey, that was as bad as it got.

(they took away my belt because I guess I looked like I was about to strangle someone... that's why I had trouble keeping up my trousers)

Oh my, I'm too freakin excited to post.

So,

2006-05-08T15:41:00.000+02:00

you're all crossing your fingers for my visa interview tomorrow - right, right?

The end is near - ha!

2006-04-12T19:48:00.000+02:00

I'll leave Hamburg soon. Hell, I'll leave Germany soon.

I can't believe how fast things are going lately.

When I turned on the webcam today, it almost looked as if my hair turned grey...

... and it didn't surprise me one bit.

Hey, is it "grey" or "gray"? I know one is British English and one American, but not which is which.

That's how my apartment looked this morning:

This is how it looks now:

Ah, I shouldn't be posting, I'm exhausted.

Anyway, I had my medical on monday and everything went well. I'm 125 Euro poorer now, I look like a fuckin junkie from all the needles that were stung in my arm and the doctor checked out my boobies a little too long, but apart from that all went well and I'm healthy like carrot juice.

Yay, healthy!

And yes, my bangs need to be cut. But I want them to grow just a little more because I'm tired of the old style and I'm thinking of getting it cut something like this:

Nena

Nena

What is it with women getting their hair cut when they face changes in their lives? And what can I do to age only half as well as Nena did? She looks so much better than in the 80s!

I hope the answer is in this old fortune cookie I found when I cleaning my room. "Opportunity is knocking at your front door.". Nah. But hey, I like this fortune.

Ah, I better stop now, I'm not making much sense today.

Anniverjerky

2006-03-19T11:22:00.000+01:00

The Blackbettie Test Labs for Meats and Beats endorse: Jim Beam Kentucky Bourbon Soaked Beef Jerky!

It's soooooo good! Thank you so much Todd and Amanda!!!! I LOVE it!

And I love Americans for getting patriotic over a meat snack. On the back of the package it's all Stars and Stripes and "beef jerky embodies the pride of America" and "the true American heritage" and what not all. Or, from the homepage:

"[...]Today, a new genuine American legacy is born from these great lands: Jim Beam Kentucky Bourbon Soaked Beef Jerky.

Born across America's great lands and touched with genuine Jim Beam Kentucky Straight Bourbon, our selected whole-muscle authentic beef jerky is a true blend of Genuine Beam Whiskey and premium beef, together marinated to individual perfection. The result: a full salty-sweet and smoky taste like none other.

Experience the original whiskey jerky and savor the combination of two great traditions that live on."
Before I ate it I made sure to stand up and salute to the brave American cows that let their lives for this delicious jerky. Cows, I owe you big time.

On other news, it's Jonnie and my 2nd anniversary today!!! Wahooooo!!! The last 2 years have been the best of my life so far and I enjoyed each and every day. I'm sad that we can't be together in person today but it also makes me happy to know that we'll be together in the very near future.

I completed some more forms for my visa today and answered all questions from my previous post with "yes", "no", "no, not in the last 2 weeks" or "Huh?!" and I will mail off everything tomorrow morning. The next and final steps (on German soil) will be the medical (april 10) and the interview where I'll be handed the visa. And THEN, the next step will be getting my plane ticket to the land of the free and the home of the best beef jerky in the world!

The joys of immigration

2006-03-12T10:38:00.000+01:00

Some questions I have been/ will be asked during the immigration process. The first part of the immigration process, that is... the joys will become even more after arrival to the US, I fear.

Have You Ever Been in an Armed Conflict? Well, I've been 6 and it was carnival and I was dressed up as an indian and a kid from school was a cowboy and that's all I can remember, officer.

How much do you weigh? Gah! You don't ask that a woman!

Have You Made Specific Travel Arrangements? No, I just got to the airport and took the next best plane and hooray, here I am.

Will you please take off your shirt - we need to x-ray your lung. lamest pick-up line EVER

Do You Have Any Specialized Skills or Training, Including Firearms, Explosives, Nuclear, Biological, or Chemical Experience? Yes. I'm a pro sparklers-holder at New Year's Eve.

List: Last Name, First Name, Clan or Tribe Name. Wu-Tang?

Would you give us a urine sample, please? Bah!

Have you ever been a prostitute? This one made me mad, seriously.

Have you ever been a procurer for prostitutes? I don't know what you heard about me, but a bitch can't get a dollar out of me. No Cadillac, no perms, you can't see that I'm a motherfucking P-I-M-P.

Are you a member or representative of a terrorist organization as currently designated by the U.S. Secretary of State? One of my favorite questions. Is the catholic church considered a terrorist organization?

Have you ever participated in persecutions directed by the Nazi government of Germany or have you ever participated in genocide? Oh my. Good luck with your search for terrorists/ Nazis/ dictators and other scum, Department of Homeland Security. I guess every terrorist will be mad when they have to fill out these forms. "By Allah, they got me! I have to tick 'yes' on this one. Damn, damn, damn.".

Have you ever been afflicted with a dangerous mental disorder? Brrrrpfffhhh. D'uh. Lalalala. hehehehe. waggawaggawagga. No.

Does this apply to you, yes or no: An alien convicted of, or who admits having committed, a crime involving moral turpitude or violation of any law relating to a controlled substance or who is the spouse, son or daughter of such a trafficker who knowingly has benefited from the trafficking activities in the past five years; who has been convicted of 2 or more offenses for which the aggregate sentences were 5 years or more; who is coming to the United States to engage in prostitution or commercialized vice or who has engaged in prostitution or procuring within the past 10 years; who is or has been an illicit trafficker in any controlled substance; who has committed a serious criminal offense in the United States and who has asserted immunity from prosecution; who, while serving as a foreign government official and within the previous 24-month period, was responsible for or directly carried out particularly severe violations of religious freedom; or whom the President has identified as a person who plays a significant role in a severe form of trafficking in persons, who otherwise has knowingly aided, abetted, assisted or colluded with such a trafficker in severe forms of trafficking in persons, or who is the spouse, son or daughter of such a trafficker who knowingly has benefited from the trafficking activities within the past five years. Could you repeat that sentence, please?

Taki Taki!

2006-03-07T20:18:00.000+01:00

The Blackbettie Test Labs for Deuces and Juices endorse: Taki Taki!

It's a spicy tomato juice that goes down smoothly but then buuuuurns its way out. On the back of the bottle it's said that Taki Taki is great for a) mixing with alcohol and b) drinking when you have a hangover. That concept takes care of everything!

I first noticed Taki Taki for the name - Taki Taki, hahaha! - but I HAD to buy it because of the logo. I mean, who wouldn't buy a bottle with a huge vagina on it? Who? WHO???

***

On other news, I'm REALLY busy these days. For every 2 things that I get done I remember 3 that I have forgotten so far. It is stressful to work fulltime. It is stressful to move within a country. It is stressful to get a visa. It is stressful to move to another continent. Now combine all that.

But I'm not complaining... I so can't wait to be with my Liebling that all this stress is more than worth it.

And hey, only 18 more days to work! (don't think I'm counting!)

(18)

(18)

(18)

Oh man, still 18 days to work!

Arrrgh!

2006-03-03T20:12:00.000+01:00

I'm mad that Jonnie and my anniversary is march 19 and not march 20.

clickyclicky

Wahooooo

2006-03-01T23:04:00.000+01:00

After almost exactly 3 months of hearing NOTHING from our Service Center, I got 3(?!) emails today telling me that Jonnie and my visa petition has been APPROVED!!!! Hallelujah! And about fuckin time!

I still have to do an interview and get that medical, but I'm pretty sure everything will will work out ok. Hey, Jonnie and me seem to have passed the background checks without problems, who would have thought? hahaha

My cat is not too excited, but I sure am!

Wooohooohoooo!

Memememememe

2006-02-20T20:34:00.000+01:00

Been tagged for a meme (whatever that is) by my Jonnielein. Guess I have to fill out the following questionnaire thingy. OK, here goes:

Four jobs I've had:
1. Blah, I only had boring jobs so far, I bet you don't want to read about them...
2. let me think, there must be something that is at least somewhat funny...
3. oh yes!
4. I once had a job where I had to walk through Hamburg's most popular shopping street with a ton of balloons I had to give to children. Not funny? You should have heard my voice after I inhaled the helium that was meant for the balloons! Still not funny? Ah, screw this!

Four movies I can watch over and over:
1. Dirty Dancing - I have these strong conflicting feelings towards "Baby". Half of me hates her, the other half of me wants to be her
2. Titanic - I have these strong conflicting feelings towards "Rose". Half of me hates her, the other half olf me wants to be her.
3. Silence of the Lambs - best movie ever!
4. Das kleine Arschloch

Four places I've lived:
1. Braubach, Rhineland-Palatinate, Germany
2. Mainz, Rhineland-Palatinate, Germany
3. Hamburg, Germany
4. ummm, there are only 3 places. OK, to make it 4: I lived one wonderful summer in Orange, CA, USA

Four TV shows I love:
1. Simpsons!
2. King of Queens
3. South Park
4. King of the Hill

Four highly regarded and recommended TV shows I haven't seen (much of):
Same as Jonnie:
1. Lost
2. CSI (in any city)
3. The Olympics
4. Any dramatic series about lawyers, doctors, or cops

Four places I've vacationed:
1. California
2. Maldives
3. Barcelona
4. London

Four of my favorite dishes:
1. Fuji Grill's Half and Half Combo
2. Pizza "Chef" from "Pizzeria Laguna" in Braubach - Pizza with pepperoni salami, hot pepperonis and gorgonzola cheese
3. potatoe chips
4. Pam's Thai coconut custard desert

Four sites I visit daily:
1. Rebel Leady Boy
2. The Real World...Blogger Style
3. uscis.gov (to check if something happened in the visa process)
4. Boz' site

Four places I would rather be right now:
1. California!
2. Braubach
3. at the lottery company's headquarter, cashing in my million dollar lottery prize
4. in bed

Four bloggers that I am tagging:
1. AmyJo
2. Björn
3. Rosa Posa
4. ummm... #4 is a wildcard

Waiting

2006-02-05T13:25:00.000+01:00

Gaaaahhhhhh!!!!!! I'm starting to lose my patience. I hate waiting. I'm usually a VERY patient person but the visa process me and Jonnie are currently going through is starting to annoy me big time.

Unfortunately, our petition is processed by (one of) the slowest Immigration Service Centers (California (CSC)) and it bugs me to see how people in other Service Centers fly through their application process and ours is taking so long.

Hey, I even have a ticker counting the days since we last heard from them.

We can track our case status online. Our papers haven't even been touched since dec 2nd. Gaaahhrkjlkgjkgjteögkdfhrutiotegrrrrrrggggg!!!!!

And we're far from being done.

OK, I have things to do in the meantime:
- get a ton of vaccinations (already got 2, #3-5 are scheduled for the next 10 days)
- gather documents and have them translated (started doing that)
- cancel rent contract (did that - will have to leave Hamburg in april)
- cancel work contract (ditto - will work until mid/ end of march)
- sell stuff
- throw away stuff (started doing that and it feels SO GOOD).

Yesterday I realized that some of the States (e.g. California) don't accept my German drivers license. Shit, do they think that after surviving almost 10 years on the German Autobahn I can't handle California traffic?!?!

And the California DMV is so generous to allow me a full 10 days upon my arrival to take their tests and get a US driving license. Funny thing is, if I'd only be a visitor to California then this would apply: "Adults Visiting California - Visitors over 18 years old with a valid driver license from their home state or country may drive in California without getting a driver license as long as their home state license remains valid.[which is FOREVER].".

So I started reading the California Drivers Handbook. The lesson I learned yesterday was how to behave correctly when approaching a railroad crossing. Like so:

And today, I plan to get a little deeper on the signaling subject.

SIGNALING

Always signal to other drivers when you plan to turn left, right, slow down, or stop. Signals may be given by hand-and-arm positions or by using the vehicles signal lights. If bright sunlight makes the signal lights hard to see, use hand-and-arm signals also.

LEFT TURN

RIGHT TURN

SLOW OR STOP

APPROACHING CSC OR DMV EMPLOYEES

What was the point again I was trying to make with this post??? Bleh, forgot... .

Valentine's day gift

2006-01-28T22:09:00.000+01:00

February 14 is coming up and just in case you don't know what to give to your loved one yet, here's my ultimate Valentine's day 2006 gift suggestion: clickyclicky.

Available in many beautiful styles (click and click and click) that all say I LOVE YOU, DARLING, I LOVE YOU! Red roses were yesterday.

Your sweetheart will love this thing... guaranteed! All these people can't be wrong!

No need to thank me for saving your Valentine's day... you're welcome.

Manic Monday

2006-01-23T22:11:00.000+01:00

Well, not that manic.

D'uh, not manic at all.

In fact quite a nice monday. But it could have been manic! If I only had enough fire in my ass to uphold a hot temper for more than 10 minutes, it sure could have been manic. Speaking of fire in my ass - NEVER drink more than 2 glasses of plum juice, hear me! But that's a different story.

My washing machine broke last weekend. My hair dryer broke. My sandwich maker broke. My bike broke. My digital camera broke. My computer is acting up. Did I mention my washer broke? My fuckin washer broke!!! Less than 3 months to go (here in Hamburg) and my fuckin washer broke.

I was mad!!! I almost wrote a post about how everythings sucks and how I hate Hamburg and how I'm so through with this part of my life and how I hate to spend so much money on things I have to leave behind anyway and how I hate the waiting, waiting, waiting. But then, I had a good glass of plum juice and the world was ok again.

And now on with the waiting.

Great articles

2006-01-16T21:16:00.000+01:00

I was dumb enough to agree to work on a project that involves flying. My first trip went to Munich and to my own surprise, I didn't totally panic on the plane. Must be because of the great in-flight entertainment:

Free Playboys!

AND free Playboy calendars!

There are some excellent articles in there, seriously!

I'm pretty sure I made a great impression on my boss when I picked a Playboy and she (and all the other co-workers, for that matter) picked conservative economy newspapers. Also, I bet she considered it very charming when I was the only one who giggled when our captain welcomed us onboard our little Fokker. Haha, Fokker.

I need to grow up, for real.

P.S.: Fokker! hahaha

A Christmas 2005 review

2006-01-05T21:40:00.000+01:00

Things I did NOT get (but am hoping to get Christmas 2006):

a toilet snorkel

a duck decoy

a 3 legged pantyhose

a gerbil shirt

Things I DID get:

3 more pounds straight onto the hips

one of the bestest gifts EVER: given to me and Jonnie by my mom... a STAR!!!

She had a star named after us ("The Sandra Jonnie Lucky Star", haha). The star will have this name forever! It is visible to the naked eye and...

...isn't it the cutest little star of them all?!?! Aaawwww...

I wish it would rain down

2006-01-04T22:13:00.000+01:00

Happy New Year! 2006, 2006, 2006!!!

I welcomed the new year hiding under the most badass umbrella ever.

2006 is going to be awesome - and dry!

Thank you so much for this cool gift, Liebling, I love it!!!

Blackbettie Business Awards

2005-12-17T22:11:00.000+01:00

The prestigeous Blackbettie Award for the best Company 2005 goes to:

Nordsee seafood restaurant!

They deserve this award for their delicious seafood snacks and meals, but mainly for

fishing me a merry little Christmas.

Congratulations, Nordsee!

Hehehe

2005-12-11T21:31:00.000+01:00

Last post under chancellor Schrödi

2005-11-21T21:21:00.000+01:00

Today at work:

Co-worker: "What are you doing?"
Me: "Translating an important document from Dutch to German."
Co-worker: "Oh, you speak Dutch?"
Me: "Nah. Not at all."
Co-worker: "Well, good luck then."
Me: "Thank you."

I need a vacation, seriously.

Oh well.

Since my life's been pretty busy and somewhat sad lately I treated myself to a new DVD/ CD burner and other new hard- and software on saturday (don't ask me about any details, I only know that everything's black and that I paid quite some extra money to have everything black).

Hey, now that I finally have a music player on my computer I can do that funny "quiz" all the cool kids did like a year ago and I was left out because I was so low-tech... you know, this one:

1. Open up the music player on your computer.
2. Set it to play your entire music collection.
3. Hit the shuffle command.
4. Tell us the title of the next ten songs that show up (with their musicians), no matter how embarrassing.
5. blablabla

Ok, here are my results:

1. Sir Mix-A-Lot - Baby Got Back
I like big butts and I cannot lie, you other brothers can't deny...

2. Eminem - Ass like that
Any song that has a line like "So Gwen Stefani, will you pee pee on me please?" has to be a good song.

3. A-ha - Stay on these roads
Aaaawwww, such a beautiful song. And yes, I had a teenage crush on the a-ha singer once.

4. Peter Schilling - Major Tom
4-3-2-1 earth below us - drifting falling - floating weightless - calling calling home...

5. The Blow Monkeys - You don't own me
I first heard that song in "Dirty Dancing". And yes, I had a teenage crush on Patrick Swayze once.

6. Gorillaz - Dare
There's no way I can sit still when this song is on. I freakin love it.

7. The Roots - The Seed 2.0
Same like the previous song. I love it.

8. Depeche Mode - Route 66 (Beatmaster Mix)
Depeche Mode! My all time favourites! And yes, I had a teenage crush on the Depeche Mode singer once.

9. Electric 6 - Danger! High Voltage!
"Fire in the disco! Fire in the Taco Bell!". I also love how they rhyme Taco Bell with Gates of Hell.

10. Neil Young - Harvest Moon
Makes me want to dance with my Liebling.

They're back

2005-11-12T20:15:00.000+01:00

New post! New post! New post!

2005-11-04T20:26:00.000+01:00

That squirrel was starting to tantalize me in more than one way so I figured it's about time to post something new.

My life has been SO busy lately... with good things, but unfortunately also with bad things. Mom had a surgery (please everybody cross their fingers so she'll be ok again soon), I will have a (minor) surgery on tuesday and work's busy busy busy.

But enough with the bad stuff, on with the good stuff.

I love my new nail file! I know I may be easily impressed, but man, that thing has more high tech in it than my first car. It even came with a manual.

Also, I saw the bestest love declaration EVER today. It was written on a piece of paper which was glued on a bike stand right between a Mr. Bread bakery and a fashion store for "stronger" women.

"Damn, Sarah. I love you! The hell with your neurodermatitis! Your frog king."

Awwwww.

Life can be so wonderful. So wonderful.

Dear Diary...

2005-09-25T13:49:00.000+02:00

Sunday, 09/18/2005

I was busy working for this year's Bundestag elections. They set up a little office in an elementary school and I had to work in a room where the school keeps all the biology exhibits. My desk was surrounded by stuffed animals, rats and bunnys and squirrels. I loved the aura that this environment gave me and though I still don't know in what position and in what company I will work in my later life, the job better involves a desk with stuffed squirrels.

Monday, 09/19/2005

Impressed co-workers with ballpen I snuck at yesterday's election.

Bought a lotion that makes my body smell like a giant Tootsie Roll (and I mean the candy, not the Tootsie Roll as defined by the urban dictionary).

Quite a good day.

Tuesday, 09/20/2005

Why is it that on the more quiet days at work, when you have nothing to do and consider leaving early that just at the very moment you're shutting down your computer a co-worker comes running in, slightly panicked, asking you to help out at a project that was due 3 hours ago?!

Wednesday, 09/21/2005

Still no new (or reconfirmed) chancellor. I mean, I'd do the job if I wasn't leaving the country next year. Sure, I'm not as sportive as Schrödi...

... or as great in general...

... neither do I think I could welcome foreign politicians like he did...

but still, I think I'd make a good chancellor, if only I had the time.

P.S.:[note to self: ask American friends if they want to be chancellor over here. Germans love foreign leaders!]

Thursday, 09/22/2005

I was informed about the details of some sort of "corporate image movie" about our company which will be shot next monday. I'll play an ordinary employee who sits in front of a computer and listens to the boss talking and who hops through the hall every now and then. I don't know if I can do that.

Friday, 09/23/2005

Still no chancellor. God, don't let it be her:

Saturday, 09/24/2005

Dear diary, let me tell you there IS a reason other than convenience that people use fabricated shampoo and conditioner rather than making their own stuff. I tried a self-made olive oil/ egg yolk/ lemon conditioner today and not only did it leave my kitchen and bathroom in a complete mess, I just can't get that smell off my hair. Not that there's anything wrong with smelling like a Spanish breakfast, but it just doesn't go along well with the rest of the body (see monday).

The "I don't want to move there so don't apply for a job there, Jonnie"-list

2005-08-28T12:46:00.000+02:00

A few reasons why Texas is NOT on it:

1. Cool belt buckles

2. Friendly attitude

3. Better kitchen utensils

4. Good people

Iowa , Idaho and Kansas are on it because I sure do like corn and potatos, but I don't want them to be my only neighbors.

North and South Dakota, Montana and Nebraska are on it because I don't want the directions to Jonnie and my house to include "Turn off the paved road".

Colorado is on it because I always hated this candy:

Utah is on it because I don't want Jonnie to think polygamy is a good idea.

Minnesota is on it because I guess I saw too many "Golden Girls" episodes and now I think every town in Minnesota is like St. Olaf.

West Virginia is on it because they have this law that when a couple gets divorced, they are still legally sister and brother. Or well, they should have that law. And I never liked "Country Roads".

Wyoming is on the list because this is not exactly my idea of a fun date:

I'm nervous...

2005-08-21T13:22:00.000+02:00

- because I'm facing cold turkey from nasal spray withdrawal

- my Jonnie is currently flying from Alaska to Arizona to California to Colorado to Missouri (not exactly a non-stop flight, huh?) and I hate it when he's not home safely and all I can do is track his flights online

- because so many things in my life will start to change when Jonnie is finally home on Aug 30... he'll finish his studies and apply for a job SOMEWHERE in the US and he'll file a petition for a visa for me

- because I miss my nasal spray

- because I'm not 100% sure about the outcome of the visa process... there are so many things to consider!

- because I don't know how long the process will take... sometimes it takes only 7-8 weeks, sometimes up to a year... and I don't know what to do in the meantime... I only have a job for the rest of 2005 and I don't know what to do after that... move back to my family in Braubach for a while? stay in Hamburg?

- because there's no way I can breathe without my spray

- because my mom will have a surgery in october... just a minor one, but still...

- because I hate moving in general and an immigration to another continent is the queen mom of moves

- because I'm not sure if my meager savings will be enough to ship my fat ass and all my belongings to the States, and live from the rest for a couple of weeks (months?) until I find a job

- because I don't know if my language skills are sufficient and if I'll ever be able to pronounce a "th" correctly (without spitting)

- because I don't know if my favorite nasal spray is available in America

- because I only put Alaska, Florida and Hawaii on the "I don't want to move there so don't apply for jobs there, Jonnie"-list and forgot to mention Iowa, North and South Dakota, Montana, Idaho, Wyoming, Utah, Colorado, Nebraska, Kansas, Minnesota and West Virginia

- because I'm not sure if I'll ever be able to handle American money without making a completele fool of myself (for christ's sake, give each dollar note a different color and/ or size and put numbers on the coins (and not just "dime" or so)!!)

Oh well, everything will be ok eventually and I'll love it. I just wish it was already summer 2006, me and Jonnie would be living in a nice apartment in Virginia Beach and I lost 10 pounds and overcame my nasal spray addiction.... oh, and won in the lottery, while we're at it. And ok ok, 20 pounds.

Classics, other

2005-08-02T23:06:00.000+02:00

[click to enlarge]

The great-grandparents' wedding! 1924

1930s swimwear

postcard, WWII time

Classics, the grandparents

2005-08-02T22:40:00.000+02:00

[click to enlarge]

Granny.

Best soccer team ever. Grandpa (standing, 2nd from left), uncle (front, 2nd from left)

Granny and her brother, early 1930s.

Grandpa (left) with mom (left) and uncle (right)

Grampa tipsy!

Granny with me (left)

Granny with the dog she saved from being killed by mean kids in the river Mosel. Unfortunately, she had to leave the dog behind when they were evacuated during WWII.

Granny and grandpa's wedding!

Schützenkönig!

Grandpa with mom.

Mom, grandpa, granny.

Grandpa with mom and uncle.

Grandpa with his friend with only one arm.

Granny in a dirndl. The words on the wall mean something like "He who does his duty every day can drink every day too". Heh.

Classics, mom

2005-08-02T22:23:00.000+02:00

[click to enlarge]

Mom, 1974.

Whoever that guy was, he was freakin cool.

Passport pic with me. Great shot.

Mom as a kid (the one on the chair).

Passport pic I.

Passport pic II.

Mom and me on a boat trip.

Mom, mid-80s.

BBQ time.

80s hair.

Reading.

Classics, me

2005-08-02T21:36:00.000+02:00

I've been to my hometown Braubach for a couple of days and I brought some old pictures back home. I'm mad I didn't take more time to look through the kazillion albums my mom and granny own and that I sometimes didn't even care to take the photos out of the frame, so there's sometimes a reflection on the pic. Oh well, some came out ok anyway.

[click to enlarge]

May 17, 1978. First pic of me, ever.

Me and Kaspar, who was born on the same day like me.

Me, easily amused as always.

Always laughing, always laughing.

Me and granny.

First posed picture.

Mmmmmhhh, cocoa.

No more cocoa.

I wasn't allowed to go into the pool, so I thought nobody should be allowed and I tried to empty it.

Holiday!

On the beach.

Boat trip.

My birthday.

I always made the guys happy.

Me 1997.

Ah, I'm tired of looking at myself (and you're probably too).. maybe I'll add some more pics later.

I came, I saw, I tickled

2005-07-23T16:07:00.000+02:00

My new hero:

***
Police Searching for Naked Tickler in New Smyrna Beach Break-Ins
The Associated Press
Published: Jul 21, 2005

NEW SMYRNA BEACH, Fla. (AP) - Police say one man could be responsible for a string of bizarre break-ins over four years involving a naked perpetrator who sometimes tickles the feet of sleeping elderly women.
The latest break-ins happened Saturday and Sunday in two separate homes, but investigators suspect the same man is responsible for five similar, unsolved cases reported in the area since 2001.

New Smyrna Beach police say they've been unable to catch him in part because they haven't had much evidence.

The incidents vary slightly, but most of the victims are over 60, said police Cmdr. Wade Kirby.

Usually the intruder is naked, but sometimes partially clothed, Kirby said. Sometimes he tickles the women's feet, as he allegedly did Saturday night, and sometimes he's discovered and flees before touching them, Kirby said.

Each time the man ran off after being noticed.

Kirby said police know only that the suspect is white, thin and appears young.

"There's not been a lot to go on there," he said.

New Smyrna Beach is 44 miles northeast of Orlando.
***

I hope he doesn't get caught by the police (too soon).

I always had this strange love for weirdos.

My dinner with Jonnie

2005-07-05T21:45:00.000+02:00

Brought to you by DEL TACO!

Let's start with a delicious macho nacho pacho burrito!

Yummm...

Tastes good, hm?

A little more Del Scorcho sauce? Definitely!

Ummm, baby, there's something on your...

YES, better!

Do you have something to drink too?

Aaaahhh, yes, ok, have a sip!

Mmmmhhhh...

Burrito's gone... still a little room in your belly?

That's what I though.

Then on to the fries!

Chili cheeeeese fries!

Spicy, huh?

I wonder what chili cheese fries look like...

Aaaahhh, I see, I see.

Ummm...

... yes.

Maybe one last sip...

Aaaaahhhh...

... stuffed, huh?

You should open your...

YES!!!!

For JohnnyC

2005-07-03T14:31:00.000+02:00

click to enlarge

I like to see other people's skulls, but my own freaks me out. Eeeeww.

This x-ray was done 1.5 years ago and I was just being a little hypochondriac, there was nothing wrong with me.

My life is exciting, episode # 346

2005-06-26T17:08:00.000+02:00

It looks like I pulled a nerve last night because today I cannot turn my head one bit. Damn. I figured I deserved a treat because of that and bought myself a yummy French eclair. Mmmmmhhhh.

Kissing the pastry good-bye.

I made such a mess eating it, but man, it was GOOD. 1000 calories though. A bite.

And yes, that was the highlight of my day. Or week. Or June.

***

EDIT:

If you have a blog, check out this MIT survey (click icon).

Yum Jonnie

2005-06-19T11:49:00.000+02:00

Wahoo - today is June 19, celebrating the 15th monthiversary of me and my liebling Jonnie.

Yum Jonnie.

Yum Yum Yum.

I HATE that we can't be together now... and probably can't be together in the next few months either. All I do these days is to wait for this year to be over. 2005 sucks. But hey, we're already halfway through.

Favorite site of the day

2005-06-15T00:48:00.000+02:00

I can't explain why, but I love this site. Some guys found an old photo album and posted the pictures.

ABC

2005-06-10T20:56:00.000+02:00

Found this list over at bozzie's, who found it at Melissa's "Self Inflicted Life". You're supposed to pick a like and hate for every letter of the alphabet.

LIKE:
arrival, bathing, circumcision, dairy produce, eaves dropping, Freddie the really mean cat, gravy, horny boyfriend, insurances, Jonnie, kitten, LAX, marketing, numbers, oral fixation, pastry, queer, rosaries, shoes, tears, u-turns, vibrators, whipped cream, X-Mas, yearbooks, Zeppelin

HATE:
ankle surgery, bills, clowns, Dairy Queen, elves, feet, gynecologists, heat, insects, jobhunting, kitchen work, low fat, marketing, noise, ovulation, pantomime, Quaker, revenge, skater, talkative people, urinals, vegans, werewolf, XXL, yellow, zinc

I freakin hate zinc.

Coffee Art

2005-05-26T22:47:00.000+02:00

Inspired by this homepage, I finally, finally found my true calling. Screw business, screw marketing, screw statistics... I'm gonna be a coffee artist! Here are my first pieces, from my decaf period.

Think positive!

Don't think negativ!

Roadkill.

Self portrait.

I'm gonna be a star.

ACHTUNG WILD

2005-05-25T19:09:00.000+02:00

I just had a friend visiting and he gave me the probably bestest shirt in the world as a gift.

Jägermeister!

I'm officially cool now.

Hirsch.

Jägermeister... it's good.

Just in case...

2005-05-23T21:14:00.000+02:00

... you've been wondering what's going on on my zonk lately, let me re-post Jonnie's blog entry from may 21:

***

When one zonkboard is not enough
Get the Big Picture over at The Internet Message Service

It's exactly like being in another dimension.
Reading just one single zonkboard on one single blog will never make sense again, it will simply result in gibberish.

Give props to boz's creative genius, my technical genius, and Sandralein's support genius.

***

Yeah, I'm a support genius.

P.S.: The zonk-o-rama link on the right side also leads you to this wonderworld of communication.

My boyfriend knows how to please me

2005-05-20T22:30:00.000+02:00

Yes, he does. Look what I found in my birthday package from him (among other wonderful gifts):

I love Chester Cheetah.

Crunchy Cheetos - Flamin' hot. They're not available in Germany, probably because 3 out of 4 artificial colorings used in them are deemed toxic and thus verboten in Germany. But that's just a wild guess.

Cheeto fingers

However, I am addicted. ADDICTED. And it's really bad to be addicted to something that is simply not available in your country.

D'uh... what was the point again I was going to make with this post?! Oh yes... Flamin Hot Cheetos, they're good.

Pssstt....

2005-05-17T13:05:00.000+02:00

psssttt... kitty, wake up, it's my birthday. Kitty? It's my birthday! Kitty, kitty, wake up...

Kitty?!
WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAKKKKKKKEEEEEEEEEEE UUUUUUUUUPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP!!!!!

There you go! Sorry if I scared you but it's my birthday and everybody should celebrate, man and beast.

Well, SOMEBODY has to celebrate, because I don't. I can't be with my family or my boyfriend today, so there'll be no celebrations.

However, it's just a little after noon and I already got some kickass gifts and many birthday wishes - THANK YOU to everybody who thought of me so far.

My mom had a wonderful bouquet of flowers delivered to my apartment:

Oh, the beautiful pink of the flowers doesn't show on this webcam pic...

Better.

So, I'm 27 now. Though I wonder if I can be 27 when I was never 26. When asked about my age, I always said 25 and I didn't even feel I was lying. I really thought I was 25. That better not be an early stage of dementia.

Oh well, I'm happy to be 27 because this will be a great age for me (hopefully, that is). If everything works out as planned, I'll relocate to the States while I'm 27 and will be able to finally start living in a "normal" relationship with my Jonnielein. But it'll also be a busy busy year... and an expensive year!

Ah, I'm gonna run out now and get me a piece of cake... no birthday without cake. Mmmmmhhhhh.... cake.

Angst

2005-05-04T21:07:00.000+02:00

So, I'm either going seriously insane or I have a really weird child in my neighborhood. I have a slight tendency to the latter, but d'uh, I'm really not sure.

It all started some 2 weeks ago, when she (4 or 5 years old) played picnic right in front of my window (I live on the ground floor). At first she was quite a normal kid, singing and playing with dolls, but all of a sudden, she started singing "Daddy will be gone soon. Daddy will be gone soon. DADDY WILL BE GONE SOON.". Over and over again. And yeah, then she felt the need to get rid of her pants. "Daddy will be gone soon. Daddy will be gone soon.". I went away from the window to look for my camera, I wanted to take a picture of her. I returned and there she was, with her father, standing RIGHT in front of my window, staring at me. Both were staring at me, no smile, nothing. Staring. OK, I didn't want to be the weird woman that takes pictures of weird naked kids, so I went away again. Returning after some 3 or 4 minutes, they were both gone, but left the kid's picnic blanket and an unidentifieable (and probably evil) toy outside.

the toy: artificial heart or bird-shaped bong?

A couple of days later, the picnic blanket still in front of my window, the kid returned. She hopped around and danced around the trees and bushes in our backyard. Then she started screaming really loud "Oh, I love green! It's so green here! I love the green trees! I love the green bushes! I love the green grass! Green, green, everywhere!". Pause. "Daddy? DAADDYYYY!!!!! It is dying! Daddy, help! It is dying! The trees - dying! The bushes - dying! The grass - dying! It's all dying, daddy! Daddy come quick and help, it's dying!". Pause. "Lalalalalala. Teeheehee. Lalalala.".

That was about a week ago.

Today, the girl returned.

She stood right in front of my window and was singing, really joyfully: "I'm afraid, I'm so afraid. Lalala. Sooo afraid. Lalala. Teeheehee. So afraid, daddy.".

What the... ?!

I'll do my best to take a photo of her in the next days, but boz and AmyJo already suggested that she probably won't appear on the picture anyway.

Ahh.

Attention,

2005-04-28T23:13:00.000+02:00

my American friends!

Have you seen the little fella on the right?

I saw this pic on some (American) site yesterday and immediatelly fell in love with that kitty. He'd be the PERFECT Meow Tse-Tung!

So, is this your room-mate's/ neighbor's/ mother's/ father's/ probation officer's cat? If so, steal/ buy/ lease it from them and have it shipped to Germany, please. PLEASE!

Status Quo

2005-04-24T18:45:00.000+02:00

Been pretty quiet lately, I know. I can't say I was too busy to post because after all (apart from a little job-hunting) I'm pretty much doing nothing these days. And I almost feel bad because I don't feel bad about it.

To be honest, I LOVE IT! I can do whatever I want, whenever I want. I started drawing again and I read a lot. And I can spend as much time as possible with my baby, if only online.
I'm fortunate that money isn't an issue these days, though I'm definitely far from being rich. I really enjoy my free time - I'm in my mid-twenties, if everything will work out as it is supposed to be, there are still some 40 years of work ahead of me. That's plenty.

However, shouldn't I be a more productive member of this society? Shouldn't I at least try to be?

I won't make a big career in Germany no matter what, I'll relocate to America in 2006 and I will have to start there at zero anyway. I'll need a lot of money for that relocation, that's the only thing that motivates me in my jobsearch. The visa will cost a lot, the move itself too... plus it will probably take some time until I find work over there too.

I'm so excited about the move! Jonnie and I still don't know where we will live, but we know that we'll have a cat which we will call Meow Tse-Tung and we'll start a gang called "The Big Ballers". Yeah, that's the plan.

Until that, I guess I'll just enjoy being unproductive - it can be over so soon. Next job interview is on tuesday. Keep your fingers crossed that I'll get the job. Or keep them crossed that I won't get it. I don't know.

You spin me right round baby

2005-04-08T18:44:00.000+02:00

Björn commented on my pirate post that Dead or Alive frontman Pete Burns looks like a male version of me.

I don't see it.

No resemblance whatsoever.

OK, Pete and I share a love for eyepatches, as I remember from some 1980s pics of him, but that's about it.

Hmmm... . No, nothing else.

Hmmm...

2005-04-03T23:21:00.000+02:00

So 2 more or less famous persons died in the last few days... German entertainer Harald Juhnke and international entertainer Pope John Paul II.. Juhnke died of Alzheimer and the pope suffered from Parkinson's.

And yes, I spent hours watching tv reports about both illnesses and still I can't come to a conclusion which illness I consider worse.

I mean, is it worse to have a glass of beer standing on the table in front of you and you don't know that you can drink it... or is it worse that you know that you can drink it but you're not able to grab it?!

Hmmm... .

Aye, mateys!

2005-03-23T15:00:00.000+01:00

I'm officially a mean pirate now.

click to enlarge

And no, that is not a penguin sitting on my shoulder - it's a mean pirate parrot, very rare black and white breed... very rare... .

Thank you AmyJo for sending this awesome eyepatch and making my pirate phantasies come true! XOX!

Oh yes, the eyepatch is pink - how cool is that?!

ARRRRRR!!!

I'm off poaching the seas now. Arrr.

ONE YEAR

2005-03-19T23:49:00.000+01:00

Today is Jonnie and my first anniversary and I'm really sad that we can't be together.

It's been the best year in my life, seriously, and I hope for many many more to come.

I LOVE YOU, JONNIE! Can't wait until we're together for good. *smooch*

Yeah right, whatever...

2005-03-12T18:48:00.000+01:00

Ummm... got nothing interesting to say

2005-03-10T23:14:00.000+01:00

... so I rather post a picture.

My hometown Braubach:

click to enlarge

This picture was taken by my uncle a couple of years ago and I really like it. Oh yeah, this is my uncle:

Heh.

I HATE job hunting

2005-03-05T00:16:00.000+01:00

Seriously, I do. There's nothing worse.

Can anyone out there get me a job, please? Pleeeaaase???

Well, you'll want to know about my most important skills and qualifications:

- I have a passionate love for statistics that is most often returned

- I'm good at picking up things with my feet

- I have a great sense of orientation

- I can distinguish 20 nylon stocking colors between "sand" and "light beige"

- Penguins love me

There just HAS to be an appropriate job for me out there.

The experiment

2005-02-26T22:39:00.000+01:00

Here you cam see thr attempt to typr a text woth my eyes closed. Except fir a couple og typos, nit bad, not bad.

Animals - cute and delicious

2005-02-24T18:58:00.000+01:00

What I did in the last 3 days:

Fed goats.

[click to enlarge]

Let birds fight on my hands.

[click to enlarge]

Watched penguins screwing.

[click to enlarge]

Played with model trains together with mom.

[click to enlarge]

Took pictures of hotel bathrooms.

[click to enlarge]

Yeah... been pretty busy.

P.S.:Male penguins are done after some 10 seconds, in case you always wondered.

I want my STV

2005-02-13T15:57:00.000+01:00

I just set up a live webcam thingy, but I'm still not too sure about it.

I'm seldom properly dressed in front of the computer and I'm really afraid that I might accidentally keep the camera on while I'm doing somthing that is not appropriate for the public eye. But then, this is currently the only thrill in my life so I might as well keep this thingy.

I'm sorry to inform you that you already missed today's highlight "Sandra changes the bandage on her surgery wound, gets grossed out by the stitches and hits the floor, almost fainting", but I'm sure "Sandra having pasta with mushroom sauce for dinner" which will be up at about 6pm CET will keep you entertained too.

So, clickety click here for Sandra TV - almost as exciting as the weather channel, I promise.

P.S.: Click on "Connect to my live video feed" to see my, umm, live video feed.

Commercial break

2005-02-05T19:58:00.000+01:00

Ah! Only 9 days left until Valentine's Day and you still don't have a present for your sweetheart?! Don't worry, you can always rely on me for tasteful gift suggestions.

Here's blackbettie's ultimate Valentine 2005 gift shop recommendation: Divine Interventions!

Classy, sexy and yet decent gifts for him and her like the...

... Jesus dildo!

Or (my personal favorite), the...

... baby Jesus buttplug!

Buy! Buy!

Yeah, I love pictures

2005-02-02T23:38:00.000+01:00

Woohoo... Jonnie just sent me a CD-ROM with all the videos we took last summer! And since I'm a good girl I'll show you some screenshots.

[click to enlarge]

Yeah, we're freakin' funny.

Why didn't I buy that fake Hello Kitty mug in Chinatown?! It totally matched my top.

Jonnie always focused on the important stuff. So did I.

These are screenshots from a salute to the RW... BS that never made it online.

Pool time!

Water ballet. Beautiful.

Must. Buy. ... Must. Buy. Things.

2005-01-28T19:24:00.000+01:00

I have no idea how I survived 26 years without these:

[click pics to enlarge]

Cakeshop origami

Plush cat-bus

Plastic cuckoo clock with Japanese cartoon figures

Stationary robot

Sushi USB memory sticks

Vibrator phone attachment

Gotta go shopping now.

To Colonel Harland Sanders, Chicken Capital, USA

2005-01-19T18:18:00.000+01:00

Dear Colonel Sanders,

I recently spotted following poster in one of your superb restaurants:

Donnerstag ist Chickentag

It is announced that "Thursday is Chicken Day" at KFC. So, may I enquire, dear Colonel, what are Friday to Wednesday then?

Sincerely,

Sandra T.

Have you had your break today?

2005-01-18T14:03:00.000+01:00

Yes I did. And while I was enjoying my break, I read Jonnie's latest post (jan 18) on Nixon's trip to McDonald's, which inspired me to do some research on McDonald's slogans.

I stumbled across the official McDonald's site on business terms and conditions.

In addition to the obvious (the golden arches logo, BigMac and a kazillion McWhatevers...), the following terms and trademarks are owned by the McDonald's Corporation:

**
[excerpt]
1-800-MC1-STCK (huh?), Always Quality. Always Fun., America's Favorite Fries, Arch Deluxe, Birdie (McDonald's is into golfing?!), Black History Makers of tomorrow, Bolshoi Mac (mmmmmhhh, ballet dancer), Changing The Face of The World, Did Somebody Say (what?), Good Jobs For Good People, Good Times. Great Taste., Gospelfest, Great Breaks, Hamburger University (Ha! That's where I studied!), Have You Had Your Break Today?, Healthy Growing Up, Hey, I'm lovin' it, It Could Happen! (whaaaat?), Kiwiburger (yuck), Lifting Kids To A Better Tomorrow (yeah, sure (clickety click)), Mac Attack (haha, that would be a great name for the next "operation" in the Middle East), Made For You, McBaby (aaaawwww. But uhhh, is that a burger? What are the meat patties made of?), Millennium Dreamers (so poetic), Super Size, The House That Love Built (), twoallbeefpattiesspecialsaucelettucecheesepicklesoniononasesameseedbun (godthisissoannoyingtoreadandwhoonearthwouldwanttousethattermanyway-sowhytrademarkit?), We Love to See You Smile ( :-) ), What's On Your Place, When the U.S. Wins You Win (oh! Yet another good name for a military "operation" in the Middle East. You might want to substitute one "win" with a "lose" though), World Famous Fries, You Deserve a Break Today
**

Mcnificent. I'll go get me some fries now.

Hmmm... hmmm... hmmm...

2005-01-15T21:14:00.000+01:00

me, typing

Life has been good to me lately. Nothing bad has happened in quite a while. *knocks on wood* That is nice, sure, but I have no material to post here. Funny that I can only talk about the foul, the annoying or the disappointing incidents, eh? Must be some German thing.

But seriously, life is good to me. I got the most wonderful boyfriend who I love more than anything in the world...

Jonnielein

... I'm healthy and I have basically everything I need (chocolate, a remote control and skirts with elastic waistbands).

The worst thing that happened to me lately is when I was in a drugstore yesterday and had to stand in line right behind an old woman who was describing her hemorrhoid problems in detail. Believe me, in DETAIL.

Did you know that hemorrhoids hang out of your anus?! I had no idea, I thought they were only inside. But then, my knowledge on hemorrhoids has been pretty minimal. Until yesterday, that is.

Oh great, this was supposed to be a praise of all the wonderful things in life and I end up talking about hemorrhoids. Ah.

P.S.: I added a couple of pics on the side-bar to the left. Feel free to scroll down and check them out.

Happy New Year, everybody!

2005-01-05T20:35:00.000+01:00

So I'm back in Hamburg and back online.

I hope everybody had a great holiday-season, just like I did.

I was clearly on Santa's "good"-list this Christmas because I got quite a bunch of lovely presents.

Among them a new webcam,

but I still haven't figured out how to adjust it so that I don't look like a ghost, all white and slighty blurred.

And I got a moose nightlight - all the way from Alaska!!!

I love it and it goes along great with the deer I already have.

And yes, that's all I have to say.
My life is as exciting as a piece of bread.

Christmas 2004

2004-12-27T17:00:00.000+01:00

Favorite gifts:

Sandra brand handkerchiefs - Sandra, so soft and clean!

Candy-pooing reindeer

Back in Braubach

2004-12-17T18:07:00.000+01:00

On a side-note: I'm back to Braubach for the holiday season. Everybody was excited to see me again.

Freddie jumped up and down in excitement to see his beloved "mommy" again.

Micky looks pleased too.

In case I won't make it online in the next few days (unlikely, but just in case...):

I wish you all a wonderful Christmas season!!!!
I hope everybody gets many gifts and lots to eat. (that's the true Christmas spirit, right?)

The 3,28 EUR that made me happy

2004-12-11T23:29:00.000+01:00

Yes, I am that cheap, I get excited over 3,28 EUR.

Today marks the first day in my life that a telephone company actually pays me money.

See:

Yeah, I know, this is money the phone company actually charged me too much last month, but still... .

I like to live in this dream world where phone companies give me money.

Pictures on my wall

2004-12-07T22:05:00.000+01:00

I checked out the Hamburg Christmas market today. Lots of food, lots of booze... nice, nice, that's the true spirit of Christmas.

I took quite a lot of pictures - unfortunately, many are blurry since it was already dark so the exposure time was longer and I'm always shaking, oh well... .

[click to enlarge]

Pig in promising position

Christmas Hotdog!

Sausages, ham, ribs and cheese a.k.a. yum, yum, yum and yum

Rudolph!

Christmas pyramid

Street in Hamburg. I'm glad they use the lights sparingly

Brushes, brooms... not to be missed on a good Christmas market

Weird guy that forced(!) me to take a picture of him...

... and his little friend

On the market

City hall... I'm not too sure about this blue light...

no, I'm really not sure if I like it...

and there are flashing lights on the top!

it looks kinda cool from this angle though

reindeer in the sky!

owls with birdseed inside - neat

carousel

oldtimer BMW bike on the carousel

nut crackers

entrance of city hall

water dispenser in city hall

Yeah, I know that this page probably takes ages to load now... .

Herrings communicate by farting

2004-11-28T22:55:00.000+01:00

Yes, they do.

And country music makes you want to die. (Yeah, as if that was news to anyone.)
The force required to drag sheep varies depending on the condition of the surface the sheep is being dragged over.
It's possible to rent the entire country of Liechtenstein for corporate conventions, bar mitzvahs and other gatherings.
Chicken prefer beautiful humans. (And I prefer beautiful chicken.)

If you want to know more about these topics or if you always wondered why shower curtains billow inwards check this out.

The Ig-Nobel prize. It's hilareous.

I guess some of the papers I wrote in the last 3 or 4 years would totally qualify for this prize.

We could be heroes just for one day

2004-11-23T23:00:00.000+01:00

Reading Jonnie's blog today inspired me for this post. I figured that his super hero likeness might want an adequate super hero girlfriend.

Super Jonnielein

So here we go:

Faster Pussycat, kill, kill!

As in real life, I couldn't decide on what to wear.

Oh well, I should really continue to work now... .

P.S.: Superheroes generated by the hero machine.

Lovely Braubach

2004-11-18T01:11:00.000+01:00

Some pics from my visit to my hometown Braubach a month ago. Sorry, I was too lazy to make thumbnails... .

a part of our house (the one in the middle),
neighbour's house I, neighbour's house II

me with cake

view from our livingroom

house I, house II, house III, house IV, house V

in Braubach I, in Braubach II, fountain, Braubach III

war memorial and fountain, war memorial again, memorial and castle, watchtower

old watchtower, Restaurant I, Restaurant II, marketplace, bar

bakery, emblem of bakery

parade I, parade II, parade III, free wine for everybody, pony had to pee, parade IV

mighty lemontree in our garden, our garden I, our garden II

Freddie, the really mean cat, Freddie again

Ok, quite a lot of pictures, but check them out, some of the pics are really beautiful and you can get an impression about were I lived for 20 years.

UPDATE:
Images from the Rhine Valley

I miss Braubach. Can't wait until my next visit (Christmas).

Throw away your television

2004-11-12T22:09:00.000+01:00

German quality music show.

Ooompah-oompah.

And yup, I noticed the woman in the audience.

Close-up.

Dunno what's more deranging... face or cleavage... .

I put the PIG in RPIG

2004-11-09T15:20:00.000+01:00

I found this test over at Boz' blog who found it over on Kat's blog, well not in a post but in the comments and god only knows how it got there. It is some sort of relationship-test... wait, what was its title again... 20 Questions to a Better Relationship or something. However, here's my result:

eXpressive: 5/10
Practical: 6/10
Physical: 4/10
Giver: 6/10

You are a RPIG--Reserved Practical Intellectual Giver.

This makes you a Rock of Gibraltar. [I'm so fat that I can be seen from Africa, or what?!] You are loyal, kind, thoughtful and conscientious. You're a good person. [I always said that I'm good, I ALWAYS said that I'm good. Now here we go, finally the proof. There, there, read it!] You make everyone around you happier and better, even if you yourself are not at your happiest or best. You just care so much about your friends and loved ones that you can't help giving them everything of yourself. It can wear you out, but you'd never let on. [Hmmm... why yes, that's also true. Yet, I'm far from being worn out.]

You're successful, smart [smart and successful, damn right!!! hahaha] and fun to be with, but your self-esteem could use some boosting. [oh well, maybe... yes] You don't like conflict [I HATE conflict and avoid it as much as possible] , and you don't like demanding things for yourself, so you can feel unappreciated. But then you wonder if you don't deserve to be appreciated. You do!

You have many small crushes, but it takes you ages to get to a serious stage with someone. [hmmmm...] You get so caught up second-guessing yourself and worrying if the other person really *likes* likes you that you never dare to make the first move. [yep] Generally you end up with another clever RPIG who knows one when s/he sees one. [I'll call Jonnie my little clever rpig from now on] This adds up to one long courtship. Fortunately this also adds up to one long marriage.

You would never cheat. [NEVER] You would never hurt anyone's feelings. [I try my best] You are so sympathetic and give so many second chances that it takes a lo-o-ong time for anyone to get on your bad side. [YES] Your only problem is you can be *too* thoughtful -- you can end up worrying and getting hung up over nothing. [hmmm... probably]

You may be a boy scout. [Huh?!?]

Of the 149903 people who have taken this quiz, 7.1 % are this type.

An ice-cold milk and an Oreo cookie

2004-11-07T01:40:00.000+01:00

A good invention would be:

A remote control that makes a sound when you clap your hands or when you whistle or something. I keep mislaying my remote control and I HATE to get up my lazy ass and change the channels manually when I know I HAVE a freakin remote control and it must be somewhere in this room. Or in the bathroom. Or the kitchen. And yes, I run around the entire house with a remote control in my hand, don't ask me why.

A bad invention would be:

A cookie dunker. An apparatus that you stick in a cookie before you dip it into milk. Keeps your fingers from getting wet because everybody knows that only bad people have wet fingers. Also keeps your fingers from getting cold.

Oh wait, that invention already exists:

the incredible cookie dunker

New ID

2004-11-05T18:38:00.000+01:00

I had to have my ID card renewed and so I went to the registration office yesterday. Of course, I had no appropriate picture at hand thus I jumped into one of these automated photo booths. Yuck.

This is the result:

Jeez, I had no idea my face looks like a freakin' pancake.

I always worried about what position I can work in when I'll move to the States one day. What about mascot at IHOP?!

Argh.

So, four more years, eh?

2004-11-03T16:15:00.000+01:00

What an outlook... .

Usually, I'm the last person to talk about politics because a) I usually don't give a shit about it and b) I don't consider myself educated enough in that field to seriously discuss it and not just throw in some platitudes.

But then, there's just no chance avoiding the presidential election these days.

As I'm writing this, the electoral vote is 254 to 252 in favor for Bush and it looks like he's going to win. But it ain't over 'till it's over, eh?

If Bush's victory really is what the majority of American people wants, ok, I'm fine with it, that's democracy. That doesn't mean that I understand or even support that decision.

What annoys me most is probably not America re-electing Bush, or Bush's politics in general, but Germany's reaction towards that. I know so many people that are pointing their fingers on America right now, knowing a solution for each and every American problem. They would do everything differently, better, of course, if only they could. They know what to do with the American election system, healthcare system, tax system, the foreign policies et cetera et cetera... but they don't give a shit about German issues. They know who they'd vote for American President (Michael Moore) but have no plan about German politicians. Let alone European politicians.

Oh blech, I really am not good in talking about politics... just wanted to say how tired I am of fellow Germans bathing in a know-it-all attitude like french fries in hot oil. I guess we're just happy not to be the #1 asshole nation of the world any more. Still, that doesn't put us in a position to be arrogant and critizise everything.

So, to make it short... Germans: Don't forget minding your own business too!
And Americans: Bush? Again? BUSH?!?!?!?!? HELLO???!!!?!?!?!

I will rot in hell

2004-10-28T21:03:00.000+02:00

Oh my... I just found out that I'm probably the meanest and most cold-hearted person in the world, because

I
don't
like
babies.

Yes, it's true. I had to take the subway today and I was a little late so I ran to the waiting train, and was about to set one foot into a cabin.... and saw a mother with a baby sitting there. And what did I do?! I turned around and got out again! Checked the next door and it was empty except for the train cleaning personell who were emptying the little waste baskets. So I got in there.

While I was sitting in the train, it hit me: I just preferred fuckin trash to a baby!

And I would do it again!

Oh man, I am so mean. And honestly, I never really liked babies... even when I was still one! They are loud and barf on you.

Jeez, I feel like I am the Grinch that stole Chistmas or something. I feel really bad. Seriously! Go hate me now... but don't hate me TOO much because I might as well steal YOUR Christmas too!

I know this is no photoblog, but...

2004-10-26T22:26:00.000+02:00

... I just found out how people discuss the birds and bees with the kids nowadays and I thought I'd share.

in the newspaper

So, in case you wonder where the babies come from, you're not alone: there is this green dog named Paule Po (which roughly translates to Paule Butt). He doesn't know where babies come from either. But he so wants one! Preferably an elephant baby.

Paule Po

He does everything he can think of, but no baby. He even asks an apple fairy for advice. She does some, umm, apple fairy stuff but that didn't help with getting a baby either. So what to do next? Hmmmmm... .

Luckily, Harald Lehmann notices poor Paule Po. He approaches him and tells him in a calm voice that he, being male and a fluffy green dog, can not have babies. That's sad, thinks Paule, and so confusing!

That's when Harald takes his 2, anatomically correct, dolls out of his pocket and undresses them.

discover, look, feel!

Paule is allowed to touch the private parts of the dolls. Everything's still all confusing, yet Paule get strangely aroused.

Oh well, I hate to stop when it gets interesting, but this is just too weird. I'm not making this up, there IS a musical for kids in theatres in Hamburg right now and the storyline really IS something like I told you. I'm not too sure about the musical, but kids seem to love it. I think.

Applaus!

Earthquake in Hamburg

2004-10-24T15:26:00.000+02:00

Remember how I was all scared before I left for California that I might die in an earthquake (since I thought that there are a couple of earthquakes a day over there)? But nothing happened.

Now I'm back in Hamburg and guess what? An earthquake hit parts of Northern Germany on wednesday! Aaahhh!!!

It was devastating.

The door of 42 years-old Andreas Lange doesn't shut that well anymore.

Some cookies fell off the shelves and an elderly woman had to pick them up again.

Thomas Becker and Katharina Jeorgakopulos were seriously pissed.

I'm still in shock and awe. But I survived.

Crazy for you

2004-10-23T18:49:00.000+02:00

When I turned on the telly today I was delighted to see Germany's favorite, David Hasselhoff, perform his smash-hit "Crazy For You".

[click to enlarge]

"See, I'm crazy for you, you're crazy for me!"

Hasselhoff on his way to tear down the Berlin Wall with his own hands and teeth.

Yes, it says "Trash 100" on this pic, but we mean it in a good way.

*sigh* I feel like watching some Baywatch now.

Stairway to heaven

2004-10-22T20:00:00.000+02:00

Stairs I had to climb because the lifts were not working:

click to enlarge

15 floors. FIFTEEN! The water drops you can see on some steps are probably my tears.

On better news: I got an "A" in Tuesday's English test! Yay! That means I'm a) fluent in English and b) psychic, since I obviously got that gap-fill test right.

English test

2004-10-20T13:58:00.000+02:00

Yesterday's English test was quite good, I'm pretty sure that I passed. I'll get the result on friday.

On tests like that you're usually asked to discuss a current political or social issue and I was SO hoping that this topic would be the election in America, but nahhh, it wasn't. So, unfortunately, I found no opportunity to stand up and yell "You're all economic girly-men!". I've had wet dreams about doing that for the last 10 days.
Instead, they gave us - a bunch of women - the topic "You're all way too fat!" to discuss. Now that's what I call a good idea. OK, that wasn't the exact title of the topic, but it sure was about diets and how the population on average is getting fatter and fatter and the health issues that go along with that and blablabla.

Another task we were given was a gap-fill test. You know, you get a text were every 3rd word is left blank and you have to fill in the fitting word. The topic of the text was something like "The environmental consequences of the 2000 Kyoto protocol (and America not having signed it)". That task was quite hard and you could hear the crowd going "What the fuck?!?!" when we were handed the papers. Because the text looked something like this:

"A _________ _________ greenhouse __________ _________ th_______, so __________ ________ __________. _______ __________ ________m__________ Kyoto? __________ _________ the _______, having ________ ___________ ______ that ________ _______. Amer_ca st_nks."

D'Oh.

All the efforts with this test are in order to get me into special courses the Hamburg University offers, so I can add an international degree to my studies plus some fancy language certificate. So I'll be a student for some more months, but I think (hope) that those extra-qualifications will help me later when I'll have to find a job in America.

I can't stand the rain - against my window

2004-10-20T13:49:00.000+02:00

Brrr....

Freddie -the really mean cat- is prepared though.

Get your war on

2004-10-18T22:52:00.000+02:00

Ah! I'll have an english language-test tomorrow - yuck - keep your fingers crossed that I won't screw it up. One should think that I'm pretty secure in english, having spent 2 months in America this summer, but naaahhhh. I learned exactly 4 new words there: gargantuan, dollop, buoyant and... ummm... well... ok, I learned exactly 3 new words. In the same time, I lost about 400 german words, but that's another story.

OK, where was I going with this? Ah yes, I have a language test tomorrow and you should all keep your fingers crossed, that test is important for my future.

I'll bring my American stationary set, hoping that the American spirit will overcome me and make my tongue speak in sweetest english only.

Lookie here, my stationary set [click to enlarge]:

desktop storm

Enduring sharpness... my pencil-sharpener

Btw, Jonnie introduced me to a great comic series this summer, I just remembered it again when talking to him some minutes ago. Clickety click here and then on "Get your war on", it's funny as hell.

Lemonade

2004-10-16T19:31:00.000+02:00

I just remembered a conversation I had this summer in California with some about 40 years-old man. I was sitting on a bench waiting for a bus and he sat down next to me, suddenly holding a half-empty cup of lemonade right under my nose.

man: "Want to drink from my lemonade?"
me: "Oh! No, thank you!"
man: "It's good!"
me: "I think so, yes. Still, no thank you."
man: "Don't you like lemonade?"
me: "I sure do, I'm just not thirsty right now."
man: "You have an accent, where are you from?"
me: "Germany."
man: "So, Germans don't have lemonade."
me: "We sure do HAVE lemonade."
man: "But Germans don't LIKE lemonade."
me: "Oh well, we like lemonade just as much as we like other sodas or tea or so. Though I have to say that German lemonade isn't as good as Californian lemonade, I really like the stuff you have here!"
man: "So where do Germans get their lemonade from? Holland?! HAHAHAHAHA"

Then the man stood up and left,laughing his ass off.

That was, umm, weird.

Eeeehh-aaahhhh

2004-10-14T20:24:00.000+02:00

A postcard from a dear friend arrived today. It shows a picturesque beach scene on the greek island Thassos.

[click to enlarge]

Beautiful.

Hello Kitty hates me

2004-10-12T19:32:00.000+02:00

Oh my... after almost 3 months I'm finally back in Hamburg, back in my own rooms, back on my computer and obviously back blogging.

One should think that I have MANY storys to tell.... about the time with my wonderful boyfriend, about my several near-death experiences in planes or about my new best friends from the U.S. Department of Homeland Security.

But today isn't a good day for telling stories. Today's one of those days where you're all busy and everything seems to go wrong. You know these days, don't you? It starts to rain when you go outside, you arrive at the post office 3 minutes after it closed and... and... IS THAT KITTY GIVING ME THE FINGER?!?!?!

my 'Hello Kitty cherry scented putty eraser'

ARGH!!

Announcement

2004-07-21T23:53:00.000+02:00

Jonnie and me decided to put up a joint blog for the duration of my visit. So, for lots of fun, sun, naked skin, rubber ducklings and exciting adventures at the 99cent-store go check this blog!!!

I won't update this blog until I'm back in Germany.

***

Jonnie und ich haben uns entschlossen, für die Zeit meines Aufenthalts ein gemeinsames blog zu führen. Urlaubsberichte, Fotos und andere mehr oder weniger amüsante Ergüsse findet Ihr in Zukunft hier.

So...

2004-07-18T22:41:00.000+02:00

It's sunday night, the countdown is almost down to zero. Aaaaahhhhhh!!!! I don't think I've ever been THAT nervous in my whole life.
Well, it's still some more hours until my plane leaves, the countdown is somewhat inaccurate, you could only set it to stop at midnight. I have already packed, of course much more than I initially planned to. Hmm. I'll take a nap now and after that, the journey begins.

Keep your fingers crossed that I won't die in a plane crash, I'm SO afraid!

OK, bye for now, the next time I'll update will be from sunny California! YAY!

And I know I repeat myself, but: Aaaaaahhhhhhh!!!!

Holiday! Celebrate!

2004-07-16T22:13:00.000+02:00

YAY! I'm now officially on holiday! This weekend will be spend with saying goodbye to my dearest friends and, of course, packing my stuff. I've never packed for a 2 months-holiday before, it's pretty difficult (well, for me). And I'm SURE that I'll forget something important... wait, let me see:

- money, credit card, IDs and so on: check
- sunscreen SPF 28: check
- sexy high-heels in which I'm not able to walk any further than 50 metres: check
- a bunch of short skirts and dresses and tops from last summer that all must have miraculously shrinked over the winter: check
- a bunch of insurances and various other papers and cards and 3 copies of each to be stored in every piece of baggage, which is not hilariously fussy, right, you just never know what paper you might need, right, and what piece of baggage might get lost or stolen and so it's clever and not overanxious and wimpy to have EVERYTHING insured and in triple copy, right, right RIGHT!?!? Oh, OK: check

I have someone to take care of the fishes and the plants and I'm not going to cook in my kitchen this weekend for the fear of forgetting to turn something off.

I think I'm well prepared.

The trip will start Monday about noon. The first flight will be with the German Lufthansa from Hamburg to London Heathrow:
[click to enlarge]

The next flight will be with United Airlines from London Heathrow to Washington D.C. where I have a short layover and have to go through all that immigration controls (which I'm sure will include rectal examinations done by a strong butch lesbian with short hair, a blue uniform and white rubber gloves). I can relax from those examinations on my third and last flight from Washington Dulles to L.A. (LAX, still with United).
[click to enlarge]

Again, I think I'm well prepared. Anything that I forgot? What would you bring on such a trip? To a different continent? To Jonnie?!

It's not that I have much free time today...

2004-07-14T16:30:00.000+02:00

... but still enough time for doing REALLY important stuff like adding weatherpixie-thingies to my blog. You can check them here or via the link on the column on the right.

I just wanted to check what the weather's like in SoCal so that I can pack temperature-adequate clothes and while checking the forecasts for both Hamburg and Orange, I found that the maximum temperature here in northern Germany is about the same (or less) than the minimum temperature at night(!) in Southern California!

Jeez, I'm SO going to get sunburned next week.

I'm glad I spent 5 years of my life avoiding sun to get an alabaster complexion and gain some gothic credibility, just to have it all ruined in 3 days. Hmpf.
Well, one could say that my white legs look like those of a dead chicken. And one could say that I never fitted in the goffic community anyway because I'm not suicidal enough and I don't have that absent-minded stare.
So perhaps it's not that bad to get a tan.

Bouillabaisse, anyone?

2004-07-12T19:28:00.000+02:00

Oh. My. God.

I just spiced my fishes! They are probably all going to die!!! Boohoohoo. I'm so busy these days, I had my dinner quickly while sitting on the couch, next to my fish-tank (and not while sitting at the kitchen table, like I usually do). So I could read while eating. Then I took a can with a pepper/ chili mix to spice my dinner. And while doing that I though "Oh! The fishes need to be fed too!" and so I opened the lid of the fishtank and poured some of the pepper/ chili mix in it. Ahhh!

My poor fishes! Now they swim in a pepper/ chili soup, that just can't be good for them.

*sniff* I'm not a good fish mama, obviously... . But, mistaking spices for fish food can happen sooo easily, see:

(left to right: spice(sp), fish food(f), sp, f, sp, f)

Well, now (an hour after the incident) all fishes are still well off, so no reason to be depressed. Perhaps I should think of my aquarium as the freshest seafood soup in this great big world, and that's something to be proud of, right?!

Finally a good idea

2004-07-09T20:08:00.000+02:00

I never really cared that much about conservation... in fact about two third of the ozone hole is there due to my extensive use of hair spray in the late 80s and early 90s. I consider Greenpeace activists to be slightly suicidal crackpots that need to shave and wash. My first car was 35 years old and didn't have a catalystic converter or any eco-friendly technology whatsoever and I loved it. Being the rebel I am, I even threw a green bottle in the bottle bank for brown bottles a few days ago.

But, contrary to my own expectations, my ecological awareness was aroused by some norwegian environmentalists lately.

Read about those guys here. (c'mon, check the link... you can see tits!)

I mean, those environmentalist have everything... a catchy slogan ("Fuck for Forest"), a realistic plan ("The goal is to take over the entire commercial porn industry and transfer all the money to protection of the environment.") and background music by a band called "Cumshot".

I don't know about you, but I feel like saving some rain forest now.

No more love songs

2004-07-07T20:29:00.000+02:00

Ah! Look at the countdown on the right! 11 days! I don't know if it's still 11 days or only 11 days. "Still" because I'm sooooooo excited and I can't wait to be with my Jonnie, but then again "only" because there are SO many odds and ends to take care of before I leave.

Well, I won't have to go to any office in the next 2 1/2 months though, which is nice.

The marketing project I finished some days ago was very successful, many of my recommendations will be put into action PLUS I managed to steal one fork, one pall-pen and two empty folders. That's so Rock'n'Roll, I know.

But oh, something different: I need your help. Answer me this: what is a total turn off for you? I mean, what makes your genitalia cringe? What makes entering a monastery become an option?
I'm asking because of my fishes.
Some months ago, I decided that it would be nice to have some baby fishes in my fish tank. So in order to get the fishes into the mood for some sweet lovin', I dimmed the light, lit some candles, played love tunes, fed the fishes luxurious food and so on and so on. This effort resulted in a couple of baby fishes and a kazillion of white fish embryos that look like sperm.
So, there are two problems with this:
1. They are just too many.
2. It all started with a certain fish couple. Meaning the younger fishes are all sisters and brothers and that there's now a lot of inbreeding going on. I don't want retarded fishes!
So, what can I do to make the fishes frigid? Let the male ones wear white tennis socks in bed? Hang up a poster of Roseanne Barr? Is THAT necessary?! Ah!

I have no idea what the Aqua Teen Hunger Force is...

2004-07-03T22:37:00.000+02:00

... and I'm usually not into posting quiz results, BUT dvl and boz posted their results over at the Real World house, and I was so enthused by the accurateness of the answers this test gives, I just HAD to post mine.

Check:

You're Meatwad! You're easily amused, you can't
read or count, and you can remove your brain
from your body and morph into various shapes.
You'll make friends with anything, including
mold.

Aqua Teen Hunger Force - which character are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

Wow! Neither my mom nor my boyfriend could describe me more precisely!
So if you kindly excuse me now, I have to prepare dinner for me and the mold.

(P.S.: But what the heck is this Aqua Teenage Hunger Force all about?!)

Sooooo, have you been naughty?

2004-06-25T20:32:00.000+02:00

No! Obviously, I was a VERY good girl during the last year, I would not have gotten SO MANY beautiful presents for Christmas in June (which I celebrate with the folks over at The Real World... Blogger Style) if I was a bad girl.
My secret Santa was the gorgeous dvl, and she was probably the best Santa I could get... look what beautiful gifts I got [click on the links to see pics of the presents]:

- two awesome metal boxes that are just the right size that my daily ration of pills fit in

- a Bettie Page magnet set!

- incense sticks, "Queen of the Night" scent... hmmmm, yumm

- devil hair sticks, accoutrements for evil, mwahahaha!

- the most kick-ass letter set including stickers, letter sheets and envelopes. Look at those awesome images! And I definitely want to change my name to Miss Anne Thrope now.

- my personal favorite: a bunch of cloned kittens! They immediately made friends with my two pink rubber poodles. The mutant black kitten is a little bit left outside though. Aaaawwwwww.

- a fortune bracelet. Awwww.

- new disciples for the cult!

- aaaaaand baby cult mascots!!! They were immediately adopted by mother evil duckling.

- a wacky wobbler! Modelled after the beautiful dvl herself, I guess.

- a neat greeting card

Awesome, huh?
So, I'm hopping under the mistletoe now, anybody who's up for a Christmas kiss may join me.

If this earth's a' rockin', don't come a' knockin'

2004-06-22T14:53:00.000+02:00

I found this link over at Nancy's... and now I'm wondering if there MIGHT be something that Jonnie forgot to tell me about SoCal... like 300 fuckin' earthquakes in one fuckin' week!!! What fresh hell is this?!?!

Well, I'll worry about that later.

My current favorite worry is that I won't be able to catch my plane in Washington D.C.. I have to change planes there and I only have a short layover and so much to do with all this ID checks and stuff I have to go through. And since my plane is the last to leave Washington for L.A. on this evening, I'm looking forward to stay in Washington for the night. Hooray.

So what shall I do if I'm stranded in Washington? Take over the White House? And paint it black? Hmmm... . I'm grateful for tips.

YAYYYY

2004-06-19T22:40:00.000+02:00

Today...

- I sold my scooter (boohoohoo)
- I bought a new pair of shoes (yay)
- is June 19, which means only one more month until my big trip to California! I'm excited!!!!!
- is me and my baby's third monthiversary! Time to celebrate!

June 19 is a good day.

Another good idea...

2004-06-15T20:39:00.000+02:00

... that I "stole" from Jonnie: GOOGLISM!

Here's the result:

- sandra is learning to crawl
I already crawled 4 metres today! I'll go for 5 tomorrow.

- sandra is not hungry now
Not true.

- sandra is doing great
True.

- sandra is a single mexican woman from hermosillo
No, but I love sombreros.

- sandra is a mature tart and she wants a big cock in her wet vagina
That's more like it.

- sandra is a concert pianist based in dunedin nz
No. But I can play flute.

- sandra is the first african
I wish.

- sandra is the kind of character that immediately strikes one as pretty damn cool
That's why I'm a cult leader.

- sandra is sensitive
yep

- sandra is my wife
ummm, who says that?

- sandra is licking the clitoris of her drunk brunette girlfriend
Yum.

- sandra is available to paint your guardian angel
I'll paint your flowerpot too if you let me.

- sandra is sandra and my sandra is female
MY Sandra is hermaphrodite.

- sandra is both informative and entertaining
That's why you read this blog.

- sandra is taking physics and it is a disaster
It was a disaster too when I decided to wear a light skirt and not-so-nice panties today though I knew that it was going to be stormy.

- sandra is a young swedish girl that takes pleasure in wanking off a hard big cock
I'm german.

- sandra is crying
No. But I bought artificial tears today.

- sandra is prime minister
And I'm soon to be Governor of California. I'll call myself The Governatrix.

- sandra is a recently married woman searching desperately for a way home to her husband
Noooo.

- sandra is an expert in women's hormonal problems and can show you how to overcome premenstrual syndrome.
Well, I DO know much about PMS but I DON'T know how to overcome the symptoms. Ask Jonnie.